It have been so long since mine last updated... It not tat my comp is down... I hav been busy for the past two weeks... And my brain gona burst form all those memorizing... I've been really studying this time and if i fail, i really dunno wat to do... Life have been boring for the past two week... Study, sleep, talk on the phone wit dedear... Tat all... Wat a boring life... I guess i more hard working now rather than during my sec sch times... I would like to thanks my gals for the birthday gift... Sorry it took me such a long time.... And thank nina for teaching me hw to calculate freight charges and etc...

Today my dedear not coming back home.... He have to go Changi to finish up his watever shit banner and etc..... I dunno tat today he also must go... Cuz he only told me tat friday he nt coming back home... He need to stay in and saturday he working... Both took place at Changi... But then jus this afternoon he called me saying tat he will not be caming back home tonite... WTF.... Hw am i going to trust him... U can't blam me... It too sudden lor... My heart trust him but my head keep on telling me not to trust my heart... Maybe cuz i get hurt by guys too often tat i choose to follow my head... Sorry ya dedear... Plus tat day i saw his Ex... Ya his ex... I told fyqa bout this... I told her tat i don hav the courage to look at her... So i can't really give fyqa the exact physical description of hers... Don hav the courage... Ya i really don hav the courage to look at his ex... Don ask me... I myself dunno y... Maybe i have hav low selfconfidence and low selfexteem.... Ya, i tend to look down of myself... I feel inferior among other people... Haiz.... Hopefully, slowly my selfconfidence will built up.... :)

i nw hav been telling myself to trust him... It hard... With exam tomorrow and this stuff... Haiz... Saturday not miting him cuz i having wedding invitation and he working... Hopefull sunday can mit him bahx... Changi where all those Mak Nyah look for customers.... Haiz... Of all beach y must SCDF choose tat beach... Hopefully he take good care of himself cuz nw my area is raining like cats and dogs... With thunder and lightning... It really scary... Take good care of urself ya dedear... After the death of my cousin i kinda abit selfconcious... life and death and come anytime and anywhere... I'm not ready to loose him yet.... i have been too dependent on him....

****Love you my dear****

IM HAPPY!!